A Beautiful Message from "The Polar Express"

Ah, what a day. It hasn't been a really busy day since we can't really go anywhere. Streets in my neighbourhood are all covered with snow that measure up to as high as my knees. I have been home for the past few days, but it's okay. I like it at home.

Anyway, it's Christmas day today and I'm glad I get to stay home with my family. There's nothing better than sharing good laughs over a nice hot cup of hot chocolate... no I was kidding! I didn't drink hot chocolate, but I did eat lots of chocolate. Ahh, holidays! Among those that we did was deciding to watch The Polar Express - a story about a boy who doesn't believe in Santa Claus anymore, so he was chosen to be one of those who will board the Polar Express to North Pole to see Santa Claus in person. Although I don't really believe in Santa, I was up for a great story.

Aside from the really awesome animation that makes you feel like you're on board with them and taking part with their journey and escapades (Oh yeah, it made me remember about that interactive theater in Enchanted Kingdom, RIALTO, although this time I'm enjoying it), there are some very inspiring scenes that really touched my heart.

This is one of them, the part when they had to stop the train because of the caribous blocking the tracks.

Just in case the video wasn't working, but hopefully it is, here's what happened. The girl was put in-charge of operating the levers and other controls because the train engineer and his helper were fixing the light bulb in front of the train. When one of them saw what was ahead, they ordered the kids to stop the train. Thomas (the boy) and the girl (Sorry, I forgot her name) were panicking and they weren't sure as to how the train will be stopped. The girl was supposed to be one knowledgeable of the controls since she was the one left with the operation, but she was just too scared and confused. Thomas was now left with a very scary task - to decide which lever he will pull in order to activate the brakes. The girl pointed to a specific lever and said that she was taught that that should control the brakes, but she was not sure about it. Thomas noticed another lever that "looks" like it could be something that would control the brakes. Ultimately, he had chosen to pull the one that the girl mentioned even though both of them weren't sure, and it didn't look a lot like a "common brake lever".

That made me say "Whoa!" It might be as simple as that but it spoke to me a lot. I can relate it with what my walk with God should be.

IT SAYS: When God has shown me something or has directed me to do something, it doesn't matter if it doesn't seem to make sense. He knows what He is doing and He sees the bigger picture, and it always is the RIGHT THING to do. I may not see right away how it is supposed to be the right thing - especially when it looks so unusual that it may make me ask "What? Are you serious?" - but when He begins to make "the train stop as a result of my pulling the right lever", I will know that I had worked according to his plan.

When I was doing my devotion, it made me think of these verses:

Proverbs 3:5-6
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your path."

Isaiah 55:8-9
8 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD.
9 "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.


Sometimes it's just hard to follow especially when we don't know what is out there. What is God going to do with me? Where is God going to take me? And then when He finally reveals the details of the starting point, we might say, "No, no, no, no, no! That's ridiculous, anything but that." Or maybe we'll ask, "Are you sure? 'Coz it just doesn't look right. It doesn't look like a good plan to me." But our idea of what is common, what is right, what is normal, or what is sensible can only take us as far as our eyes can see... as far as our mind can fathom.

Say I'm in a marathon and I'm running behind another person; the finish line is still a few kilometres away. If my eyes are focused in a straight direction, the only thing I would be seeing is his back. I don't really see the finish line. I may not even be aware whether the finish line is close by or is still a few metres away. Then I see another path, a "shortcut" or so I thought. In my mind I want to take that route because it seems like it would bring me to the finish line faster. But then I hear the commentator say that we are approaching the end of the track; thing is, it's hard to believe since I can only hear him. It wouldn't make sense because I couldn't see anything in front of me but this guy's back, yet I can see the other path very clearly. What would've happened if I took the shortcut? What would've happened if I continued on with the race?

Life is full of choices, but blessed are we who has a God who guides. We always have the option to choose what is right - what is in accordance with the plan of Him who paints the entire picture. The only issue is whether we TRUST Him enough to obey even when His command doesn't seem to fit what we think things should be, or when He is leading us to a path that is totally in the opposite direction.

If Thomas didn't pull the correct lever but instead pulled the "seemingly correct" lever, what could've happened? I don't know, but I do know what wouldn't happen - the train wouldn't stop.


Watch this, as a conclusion. :)



MERRY CHRISTMAS AND GOD BLESS YOU ABUNDATLY.

Merry Christmas Everyone!

HAVE A GREAT AND WONDERFUL CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE!!!! !!!

With 2 days before Christmas REMEMBER:

Jesus is Better than Santa

Santa lives at the North Pole.

JESUS is everywhere.

Santa rides in a sleigh

JESUS rides on the wind and walks on the water.

Santa comes but once a year

JESUS is an ever present help.

Santa fills your stockings with goodies

JESUS supplies all your needs.

Santa comes down your chimney uninvited

JESUS stands at your door and knocks.. and then enters your heart.

You have to stand in line to see Santa

JESUS is as close as the mention of His name.

Santa lets you sit on his lap

JESUS lets you rest in His arms.

Santa doesn't know your name, all he can say is "Hi little boy or girl, What's your name?"

JESUS knew our name before we did. Not only does He know our name, He knows our address too. He knows our history and future and He even knows how many hairs are on our heads.

Santa has a belly like a bowl full of jelly

JESUS has a heart full of love.

All Santa can offer is HO HO HO

JESUS offers health, help and hope.

Santa says "You better not cry"

JESUS says "Cast all your cares on me for I care for you.

Santa's little helpers make toys

JESUS makes new life, mends wounded hearts, repairs broken homes and builds mansions.

Santa may make you chuckle but

JESUS gives you joy that is your strength.

Santa is a myth

But Jesus is the Truth, the Way, and the Life

While Santa puts gifts under your tree

JESUS became our gift and died on the tree.

It's obvious there is really no comparison.

We need to remember WHO Christmas is all about.

We need to put Christ back in Christmas.

Jesus is still the reason for the season.


May the Lord Bless and Watch over you and your loved ones this Christmas 2008

And may He prosper and bless the work of your hands in the New Year.



Your Brethren in Christ,

Fred,Rebecca, Lucas, Danica, and Alissa

----------------------------------

Taken from Tito Fred's email.

"Grace" by Laura Story

Grace

Laura Story


My heart is so proud. My mind is so unfocused.
I see the things You do through me as great things I have done. And now You gently break me, then lovingly You take me and hold me as my father and mold me as my maker.

Chorus:
I ask you: "How many times will you pick me up, when I keep on letting you down?
And each time I will fall short of Your glory, how far will forgiveness abound?"
And you answer: " My child, I love you.
And as long as you're seeking My face, You'll walk in the pow'r of My daily sufficient grace."

At times I may grow weak and feel a bit discouraged, knowing that someone, somewhere could do a better job. For who am I to serve You?I know I don't deserve You. And that's the part that burns in my heart and keeps me hanging on.

You are so patient with me, Lord.

As I walk with You, I'm learning what Your grace really means. The price that I could never pay was paid at Calvary. So, instead of trying to repay You, I'm learning to simply obey You
by giving up my life to you For all that You've given to me.

My Heart Sings...

So here I am again, having another one of those moments.
It's one of those days where you go from zero to FULL.
You don't know what I'm taking about, no?
It's okay. LOLZ.
I'm actually happy and smiling.

But it feels good to finally be IN GOOD TERMS with the two of you. :)
I know I do feel something there, but you know what, my heart is the LORD's.
If ever you want to ask for it, ask HIM. 'Coz I don't have it. ♥

"So I heard you're in love", Kuya Barry said.
Hah yes! I finally realized how it is to be truly in love. To have that foundation in Christ. To enjoy life with or without a particular special someone. I mean, sometimes I still do think about it and I'm not closing doors, but it's not the point of living. It's simply an add-on that I can do without.

It's so nice to finally be out of that terrible cocoon, where all you get to see is false affection and worldly love. I've seen A LOT of people crying their hearts out because of broken relationships - with reasons of all sorts. I keep on telling them that they don't have to endure that kind of pain if only they see what I am seeing. But they don't listen, they must've thought I don't understand. Oh but I do, oh I DO. If only you've known what I've been through before, it's painful. I just hope that many would realize where the actual love story begins - the moment you give God your pen.

And so yes, I'm still continuing my journey. What is next? :)
Surprise me Lord. You know I love good surprises...

Reasons Why I Love Jesus More Than Edward Cullen. :)

I Wish Girls Loved Jesus As Much As They Love Edward Cullen by Beky!! Christmas Contest!!

OH, but I love my JESUS MORE than Edward Cullen. :)


= A normal guy would say: “I love you, baby!”
= Edward Cullen would say: “You are my life now”

= God would say: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving kindness.” - Jeremiah 31:3b

♥

= Edward Cullen would say: "The Lion fell in love with the Lamb."

= Jesus, the Lion of Judah, became the Lamb of God who was sacrificed so that through His death you may have life.
*2 Corinthians 5:21 – “God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”

♥

= Edward Cullen would sing you a song he wrote for you while playing the piano.

= God will exult over you with loud singing!
*Zephaniah 3:17 (Revised Standard) - “The Lord, your God, is in your midst, a warrior who gives victory; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will renew you with His love; He will exult over you with loud singing.”

♥

=If you died Edward would kill himself because life without you isn’t worth living.
*"Well, I wasn't going to live without you." He rolled his eyes as if that fact were childishly obvious. "But I wasn't sure how to do it--I knew Emmett and Jasper would never help... so I was thinking maybe i would go to Italy and do something to provoke the Volturi."

=Jesus already died on the cross so that you don't have to receive death for your sins, because He values our souls.
* Isaiah 53:5 - “But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.”

♥

= Edward Cullen would sing until your nightmares went away.
*"Do you want me to sing to you? I'll sing all night if it will keep the bad dreams away."

= God will not just sing away the fear, He will DEFEND you from that fear and even send His angels to your rescue.
*Isaiah 41:10 (NIV) - “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
*Psalm 91:11 (NIV) - "For he will command his angels concerning you, to guard you in all your ways."

♥

=As you left the house Edward Cullen would say: “Come back to me love”
*He smiled my favorite smile."Hurry back to me"
"Always"

=When you wander off, God would exert all efforts to find you.
*Matthew 18:12-14 - "If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to look for the one that wandered off?"

♥

=Edward Cullen would make you breakfast everyday.

=Jesus would never make you hungry nor thirsty all day, all night, and forever for He is the Bread of Life and Living Water.
*John 6:35 (NIV) - "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty.”

♥

=Normal Guy would say: “You hair looks like a haystack ….go brush it!
=Edward Cullen would say: "Your hair looks like haystack…but I like it”

= Jesus would say: “You’re a sinner… but you are worth dying for.”
*Romans 5:8 (NIV) – “But God demonstrated his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

♥

=Edward Cullen truly means everything he says.

= God doesn’t only mean what He says, His Word is stone-pierced and flawless. He has never broken a promise. NEVER.
* Psalm 89:34 - “I will not violate my covenant or alter what my lips have uttered.”
* Psalm 18:30 – “As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the Lord is flawless.”

♥

=Edward Cullen is very patient… even at times when it’s hard to do so.

=God’s patience is unlimited!
*1 Timothy 1:16 – “But for that very reason, I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinner, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life.”

♥

=Edward Cullen sparkles in the sunlight.

=God doesn’t just “sparkle”, He is blazing with light!
*Psalm 76:4 (NIV) – “You are RESPLENDENT with light, more majestic than mountains rich with game.”

♥

= Edward Cullen is very intelligent.

= God’s thoughts are BEYOND comprehension.
* Psalm 55:9 (NIV) – “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

♥

=A normal guy buys you flowers and chocolates.
=Edward Cullen buys you a car.

= God gives more than what 1000 normal guys and 100 Edwards can give, combined… every time you ask. :)
*Psalm 2:8 – “Ask of me, and I will make the nations your inheritance, the ends of the earth your possession.”
*John 15:7 – “If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.”
*Philippians 4:19 – “And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.”

♥

=Edward Cullen loved a clumsy, average girl like Bella

=Jesus’ heart goes out to the filthiest, poorest, even most immoral sinners ever to walk on earth.
*1 Timothy 1:16 – “But for that very reason, I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life.”
*Matthew 9:12-13 – “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”

♥

=While far apart in different places a normal guy would say: “I miss you”
=While far apart in different place Edward Cullen would say: “It’s like you've taken half of myself with you."

=Jesus doesn’t just reciprocate love and emotion, he even aches and longs for people who doesn’t even want to have anything to do with Him.
*Luke 13:34 – “O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing!”

♥

= Jesus is just the ultimate romantic.
*Romans 8:38 – “For I am convinced that neither DEATH nor LIFE, neither ANGELS nor DEMONS, neither the PRESENT nor the FUTURE, nor ANY POWERS, neither HEIGHT nor DEPTH, nor ANYTHING else in ALL CREATION, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

♥

= Because His love SURPASSES KNOWLEDGE.
*Ephesians 3:18 – “And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have the power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long, and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.”

♥

= Because He left His Kingdom to die for me.
*Philippians 2:5-8
5Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
6Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
7but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
8And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross!

♥

= Edward Cullen is fictional.

= JESUS CHRIST IS ALIVE and He will come again!!!
* John 14:1-3 - “Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.”

--- > I don't know about you but I'm speechless. And those are only few verses from the Bible, not even enough to fill up one side of a page. Ahh, pure pure love. :)

--- > I'd love to tell you more but it's 4:43am already. :P


"Why settle for the Knight in Shining Armour when you can have the KING of Kings."

♥ Blessy



(I found those "reasons to love Edward Cullen" all over the internet. Oh and btw, I'm not a hater. I think his character has been written quite well. Kudos to Meyer!)

Quotes from mighty men of God.

Christian MySpace Graphics


Christian MySpace Graphics

The only Music Ministers to whom the Lord will say...

Christian MySpace Graphics

Here in Your presence, heaven and earth become one...

Here in Your presence, heaven and earth become one...

It's amazing how this line speaks a lot. Truly that when His people here on earth begin to join the heavenly worship , heaven and earth become one. There is an overwhelming exploding atmosphere of hearts being molded as one - one purpose, one mind, one will, one voice. God's purpose for creating His most valued creation comes to its full glory.

The heavens worship Him, the trees worship Him, the mountains worship Him, the animals and all other creation above, on, and below the ground worship Him... but when His people begin to lift up their hands and voices in adoration, the very purpose is fulfilled. For that moment in time, there is a revelation of what will be happening when heaven and earth become one at the end of time. Isn't God's plan truly amazing?

Expect more, desire more, WORSHIP HIS MAJESTY! 'Coz you can't help but do that... :)

Amazing He is!

W for Winter? No, W for Worship.

Usual day - I woke up late though, and yes I missed my Biology class (again). But then I need to go to school because I have a quiz to write for Biology tutorial. So I was on the train, staring outside as always, enjoying my favorite view (between Edmonds and 22nd Street), slightly smiling and sighing whenever I feel something good inside, when I thought of something that I have never thought of before.


If I recall correctly, I was listening to Parachute Band's "All the Earth" on my iPod at that time. ...hear the trees, joyful cry, praising You... . At that moment, when I looked at the trees one by one, I have seen something different. I said to myself, wow, look at the branches of those trees. They look like they are raising their little arms to praise their Creator. The sight of towering pine trees against the vastness of the sky never looked so majestic. ...hear the trees, joyful cry, praising You... . And I'm seeing it. It's amazing. They speak silently yet they worship with zeal, something that I have never seen before. What amazed me more is the sight of those smaller trees, and even those little bermuda grass sprouts. All day, all night, "hands and arms" raised up high! I can't even keep my hands raised for 30 minutes straight!







But the best thing I have seen all day is this. Yes, I did see the pine trees. Yes I did see those trees that still have their leaves on. Oh and yes, they look wonderful. But what about those that entirely lost their leaves earlier this fall season? I wonder what their story is. Winter is coming up... it's all part of the cycle... Yeah I know that. But when I clicked my brain's camera and developed the picture in my head, it's different.






Some would think it is a gloomy and sad picture. I thought of the same, but God made me see it differently. Yes it is nice to see these trees with all their splendor; it's great to enjoy looking at the different colors of the leaves during fall. But once those leaves are all gone and what is left to see are those dark, spooky-looking branches, do they still tell of a glorious message?


YES! I have realized that even though those leaves that bring splendor to their stature give glory to the Creator of all things, and when these trees lift their branches in worship, they tell of the beauty of the Lord, taking them all off brings greater focus on God. We see them for what they are and what they do, we clearly see their devotion in worship. Now, without those leaves, we clearly see their branches - their arms and hands - lifted up high in worship of the Great "I Am". They may be naked, but in their nakedness, their highest praise shows. Did they curse God for stripping them off their layer of "clothing"? They have been taking good care of their precious leaves during the rest of the other seasons and now they are being commanded to take them off? Ouch. But did they mutter complaints and annoyance? No, they kept their "hands" up high! ...we'll praise you in the spring, in the summer, in the fall, and in the winter Lord. We'll praise You all day, all night.


What an amazing way to illustrate how we Christians should be! When everything is stripped away, all that should be seen from us is our extravagant worship, because that's what we are created for. What are these extra things in life? They are like the wind that comes and goes. They aren't ours, even our lives aren't ours! We are but stewards of God's treasures. In the end, it's not going to be a matter of how much we give out of our abundance, but how much we give out of our nothingness.




Praise be to God forever and ever.



CREATED TO PRAISE. BORN TO WORSHIP THE ROCK OF SALVATION. ♥

Fragrance and Thorns

Sometimes I do feel a slight prick in my heart whenever I see couples who are very much happy and in love. Often times I just don't care, especially when I see younger couples who seem to be ecstatic about having someone to cuddle up with.

Sometimes I do feel sad; sometimes it just doesn't matter anymore. I do have thoughts in my mind - when will my turn be? Is there really someone out there that God has set apart for me? Or what if He wants me to be single for the rest of my earthly life? I want to make sense of things. I want to know His plans.

Sometimes I do ask - why this? Not that I hate it, not that I like it either. It just confuses me a lot. I've had my fair share of grave mistakes in the past and I don't want to repeat history. I've read somewhere that if you want to raise your caliber as a woman, you must set a high standard for men. Exactly, I don't want to give my heart out to anyone who walks by and asks for it; I'm happy I got over the "he's cute so he'll make a great bf" stage.

Sometimes I want to do things my own way; sometimes I do get tired of waiting. Sometimes I'm stuck in the middle, and that's where I am actually... well, let's say most of the time. I want to believe that there will come a time wherein I would see God's perfect match for me. He need not be perfect like those fairytale princes and romance novel hunks, 'coz when he is God-given, I'm sure he's the ONE. But when? Or what if I'm waiting for nothing? I'm confused.

Sometimes I just can't find the answer myself, even if I look through every page in the Bible. I mean, I know it's there but I do need help finding it and understanding it; I'm not a one-man band, I need help. I do thank God 'coz He does speak to me wherever I lay my eyes on. Just a few things I've read:

"Yet in the Bible, those who followed God's leadership and guidance when searching for a soulmate (Isaac) fared better than those who tried to do it their own way (Jacob, David, Solomon, etc.)" - Brian Tubbs [that I haven't noticed before]

Demoss exhorts singles not to make marriage and sex their objective, but rather to become a godly lover as Christ did. "If we’re to become more Christlike, we’ll need to learn that generosity and serving others is at the heart of the matter," concludes DeMoss in Sex & the Single Person. "In doing, we’ll best prepare ourselves for life whether we remain single or married." [I like this one. Godly lovers.]

"Honor God with your life. Keep your vows to him even if it hurts. It will pay off in the long run." - (I forgot who said this.. credits to you) [True that.]

It still hurts. It does, but I can't afford to lose my relationship with the One who loves me the most. Although the pain may mask my heart and my eyes, causing me not to see the love He is constantly giving me, but it's there. I just have to see it, it is right there.

But few things are for sure,

I'd rather be single than be with the wrong one...

I'd rather be single than be lost in the world of earthly lust and immorality...

I'd rather be single than hate myself afterwards for not listening to what God is saying about marriage and relationships...

I'd rather be single than be addicted to pseudo-affection... and pain.

I want to find my contentment in You, Lord.

Pondering.

Lord, let Your love consume me like fire.
I want to dwell in Your presence forever,
and stay where You are.
It's overwhelming but it feels so good.

When it doesn't feel right...

I miss the times when I don't have to exert effort in friendship.
It's just is. I don't feel uncomfy or intimidated. It's just how it is, we are friends.
No need to explain myself, or prove myself to them.
No need to always start the conversation, or think hard about the next topic or next thing I'm going to say.
No awkward silences. If there are some, they just resort to laughter afterwards.
No need to try and fit in because I don't have to. We're just part of each other.
We can endure long talks on the phone, text messages all night long.
They got my back, I got theirs.I'm always part of the gimmicks and hangouts. I rarely missed out on those things.
Everything's genuine, what I see is what I get.
Those were the times when I just feel happy upon seeing them, and actually enjoy their company.
No one's left out, we were all in this together.
It was never just a "hi, hello" relationship, but it was an actual friendship.
I miss the times when I was actually friendly enough to befriend the entire class.
I miss how I'm so outgoing, and so jolly, and so funny, and so down-to-earth.
I miss how I'm always one of those people whom everybody actually knows of because of what I do and who I am.
I miss being a chum, a confidant, someone who would always listen and cheer people up.
I miss having tons of friends whom I can share my laughs with and spend movie days with.
From joyrides to mall hopping, the memories are just priceless.
I miss having chums whom I can tell everything to, who will listen and not grow tired of it.
Who actually know when I'm not in a good mood or when I'm not feeling well, or maybe if I'm broken-hearted. Who would message me early in the morning just to ask if I'm okay.
Friends who not only care about their close friends but everyone else. It's hard to fit in when you know you don't.
It's hard to take that first step. And get stuck at that first step.
Sometimes I wonder if it's just me.
But then again... I wouldn't really feel this way if there's nothing that makes me feel the way that I do.
It's hard to peek through little worlds, and try to find one that speaks most.It's harder to find one that is open.And every single night I ask God why I sense and see the things that I see.
Is it because I don't want to let go and start anew?
Or is it because they just don't want to let me in.

It's not that I lost the luster that I have in building friendships, I think I know I still have that.I know there's something wrong...

But I just want to find my old self again. The true me. The real me. Not the old ways, but the good in me.

It's hard to have just one or two persons to talk to all the time beyond the "hi's and hello's" of everyone else. I know how important it is to have friends, godly friends especially.

If it's just like that, maybe I could find the intimacy that I'm looking for somewhere else. I know God will lead me to them. I just know. Then I will truly be at home.

Peace Arch... and some more longing.

Well this morning was okay. I was half-lazy, half-sick... or maybe 1/4 lazy, 3/4 sick. I didn't go to the Sunday devotion again, because I was just too sick to get up. I even thought I won't be able to back up; I had no voice, really. I just decided to go on stage at the last minute. I was like 'should I stay or should I go now', *insert music here* LOL. But God is really good, at least He did let me stand even though I can't move that much and I feel like I'm gonna faint. =p. I didn't go back there for the ministering after the word and the victory though, I just can't do it.

Hectic, hectic, hectic sched. School's starting on Tuesday. But not for me... it starts tomorrow. =/ Well I have to go there tomorrow for this training thing and what not. I should just skip the whole thing and go somewhere else - out of province, perhaps?

I would say I didn't really enjoy my summer. At least I had this nice weekend with my family... oh and CYN Camp. But other than that, it was pretty... plain. No trips to Pinas, not even a single trip to Victoria. My parents and I had this small talk about us not going anywhere... I know I had made my point though. I was starting to get really tired of seeing the same four-cornered place, same intersections and stop lights, same stuff over and over again. I want something new; I feel like Surrey is choking me to death. I'm not claustrophobic but I feel like I'm locked up in a tight, secluded place and I'm gasping for breath.

Awesome though, we went to Peace Arch today. For the first time ever, I've stepped on US soil. LOL. And I never even realized I've crossed the geographic border already (not the barricaded one). I could've taken a picture of my first step! LOL, tourist. Another memory etched on my heart. =D Anypoo, it's always nice to run away from all craziness and be with my family; I always know that I'm home when I'm with them. Aww. Mush-mush-much. Few months from now, I'm going to cross that border... but for now, I'm happy seeing that other side. It makes the wait so much exciting. Kinda like love...

'put that past away... put that past away... put that past awwwaaaayy', expect for something great...no, greater... PERFECT.

I know I have my unfinished business that is yet to be done, but I shouldn't be so lost in it. You are just another northern star; that's all you'll ever be.


Some 'cham'callitz:

-- Something confirmed, another northern star added to my constellations. When will I ever see the end of the rainbow? I'm waiting Lord.

-- Saw my long-time-no-see friend, Marvin, today.

-- Bit disappointed with Duty Free, but then again, it is Duty Free anyway. =p

Bloggnish bloggnish and whatcham'callitz.

SO I just realized, well not really "just realized" since I've been aware of this since...some time ago, I might have an account in every blog site imaginable (Okay I might have exaggerated a bit). What to do then? It's good to only have one active, two or more is just a hassle. =/ I could've had my own domain if Wordpress hadn't made my head ache so badly. LOL. Anypoo-poo. Bloggnish bloggnish, we'll see how it goes.

Ooh yeah, speaking of whatcham'callitz, my friends and I went downtown to watch this really nice Filipino movie. It's entitled "A Very Special Love". It was nice seeing new reel-life couples. This one has Sarah Geronimo and John Lloyd Cruz - yeah I know, but hey infairness it was a really good team-up. I love how it's so funny too, Sarah's a natural, and John Lloyd... is really gwapo. =D
If I haven't been distracted by the fact that... *secret, I'm not telling*, I could've enjoyed it better.

~*Going through Your first stanza, will you take me to Your Chorus now?*~

Coffee with Jesus

Coffee with Jesus

"What exactly is prayer? Is it a time for us to tell Jesus about all of our problems and ask him to fix them? Or, rather, is it a two-way conversation with our Lord and Savior? When you pray, who does most of the talking? Do you ever let Jesus get a word in?"


Watch this, this is very true.

Aboard the Emotional Rollercoaster...again.

Undo - Rush of Fools

This song really speaks to me a lot at this point in time. "I've been here before, now here I am again..." Oh yeah, that's how I'm feeling. I feel like I'm in a carnival, and I'm riding in a rollercoaster; however, it's not something that I usually enjoy - not when I've been riding it over and over again.

Have you ever gone aboard the "Emotional Rollercoaster"? Oh I have been, and I'm on it right now. It's a weird and overwhelming feeling, really, that if someone would ask what my problem is, I would have no clue as to what I would say. I know I have a lot to mention, but for some reason, my mind will just go blank even though my heart feels like bursting out.

Why can't I just continue with what I know is right? Why still fall in spite of the truth that lies within my heart? For some reason, something is stopping me, or should I say, someone is trying to lure me away from You.

I need You Jesus. :(

The Start of the Journey

Honestly, I don't really know how I would start this blog right now. But then I think I just did! Haha, anyway, it's 2:32 am and I believe I should be doing something else - sleeping, to be exact. However, I really want to grab this opportunity to take you on a journey that has just been started and maybe a trip down memory lane.

"Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." - Jeremiah 33:3

As a kid, I had a very extensive imagination. Actually, I believe I haven't really lost my lifetime ticket to Lala-land. Oh you know - the land of kings and queens, fairies and magic, royal balls and Prince Charming, porcelain dolls and tiaras, castles and towers, candies and sweets. I have tons of fairytale books and I occasionally borrow the VHS versions especially when I visit my hometown and see my cousins. From Cinderella and Snow White to Ariel and Belle, it was almost a nonstop ride to the land of happy endings. Oh I dreamt of that - being a princess, finding my one true love, having a prince who will sweep me off my feet, wearing puffy ball gowns and glass slippers, and living happily ever after. I love fairytales and fantasies... and science experiments. I know, that's how wide-ranged my imagination was: fact to fiction. I also dreamt of building a mini hovering vehicle - or a flying scooter maybe - just because I wanted to really make those science fiction movies come to life. I began to spend my after-school hours inside a HUGE public library (yes, high ceiling!) researching about the Wright Brothers, and scanning through big bulks of Encyclopedia just for fun. I loved the feel of their leather-bound covers, the look of the gold lining on the edges and on the side; I adore the anquity of some of these precious treasures. And yes, from futuristic to ancient and from science to arts - my mind traveled to-and-fro. So you could also imagine what else I loved and still love, vintage! I was a discovery enthusiast: I used to always go inside this tiny room at my grandparents' house and peek into antique closets with all these hidden compartments. I found lots of coins from the 1900s, a few old gold watches, old photographs, and letters. This was like treasure hunting for me, and indeed I considered my findings as treasures. My imagination ran wild whenever I played, and my mind traveled to many places with the books I read.

SO WHAT? ... Remember that verse I quoted above? Many would say that it is God's personal telephone number, a hotline that never goes busy. But I've just realized how much more it meant to me and how much more I can relate to God through it (Oh my goodness, I'm telling you, as I am typing and thinking, God is explaining this to me better). Recently, I really wanted to patch up my relationship with God; I long for my prayers to be more than just petitionary, but for them to really be relational and intimate. Gone are my nights of lifeless talks and routine-driven prayers - at least that is what I really wanted. But I don't know where to start or how to start; I cannot even focus on intercession because I know I have to pray for something more important. I even feel selfish because I've been praying a lot for myself lately than for others; but I know that before I can even minister to others, I have to be ministered first.

If we were to talk about phone lines, here's an illustration of my conundrum (well, not really, I just want to say something fancy): Ever ordered pizza through the delivery service? Well, I haven't, but I've seen enough movies so I think I know where I'm going with this. Haha! Isn't it that when you call, you just basically state your business of calling - which is getting your pepperoni pizza and diet coke - and hang up right after the deal is done? Usually you do, except when you prank call, but that's out of the topic. It is basically the same as petitionary prayers, "Lord I want this, I want that. Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Amen." Translated to pizza delivery language, "I want a pepperoni pizza with extra cheese and sauce, and a large diet coke. Thank you." I usually do that, less praisy, more asky. I praise God just because it is part of ACTS (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, Supplication), not because I really want to with all my heart.

"Lord, I praise you and magnify your Holy Name... by the way, here's my list of
needs and the list of others' needs too."

The longer I pray like this, the more it becomes a burden than a joy. I know at some point I need to stop; I just won't survive this boring routine of doing my devotion every 9pm. I have to find THE missing piece. And that is what I have learned... I have to have a heart-to-heart talk with the pizza guy. Oooooohh, ahhh-wkk-waardd. I know, and if it were happening in real life, uh yeah, that would be a trip to planet Woo - Land of the weird! See my point? It is awkward when I don't know the person that well or at all! Let's say, sure I want to, but how or where do I start? THAT is my problem, how do I not only talk to that person on the other line, but also converse...intimately? But the best thing about this is that God isn't just a pizza guy; he is way more than that, WAY more. He will never feel weird when I start to draw near to Him and begin to ask "How did your day go Lord?" (Although technically, since one day for Him is a thousand years for me, my question is yet to be answered...in the year 3000. But, might as well give Him a good chuckle. Haha.) But how do I really get to be intimate with God?

Here is His answer: Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know. Okay, so I call, He answers. But wait... He'll tell me of great and unsearchable things I do not know? Looks like treasure hunting to me! And he is the one to give the treasure map. This is what He is telling me: renew your passion for discovery, let your spiritual imagination run wild, fulfill your vision, ignite your childlike faith, SEEK ME AND YOU WILL FIND ME. Peek more into the hidden compartments and delight more in seeing high towers of countless hard, leather-bound books; adore the mystery of God and long to see the treasure that is in Him. Do not give up the dream of making a flying scooter, and do not forget Cinderella and Ariel. In other words, I must use my beginning to look forward to the end. I must go back to my first love.

I may not know yet how to work it out exactly as God wants me to use it; nevertheless, it is the start of countless discoveries I will make, the beginning of God's unfolding of His treasure map. He did not put this passion in my heart for no reason; oh He knows how excited I get with mysteries (that's why I loved reading Nancy Drew books). He also knows that I am losing it slowly, and He doesn't want that to happen. I bet my heavenly Papa, my great storyteller, the captain of my ship, the author of my story, and the treasure of my heart has tons of incredible things to show me... did I mention He is currently working on my love story, too?

Yep, who said Prince Charming is a myth? Not with my author. ;)

Stay tuned. God bless!

"One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple." - Psalm 27:4

~*Living the Love Song*~