The Silence of God and when God says “No”
by Blessy Liquido
Key Verse:
Matthew 27:46 (NIV) – About the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani? – which means, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”
The hardest part in praying is when God doesn’t answer or God says “no”. There’s nothing more heart-piercing than having your prayers unanswered or when the answer is not what you have eagerly expected.
It could be that God didn’t grant you the job you wanted, didn’t give you the house you dreamt of, hadn’t given you that perfect guy or perfect girl that you’ve been expecting all your life (“Mr. Perfect may not always be Mr. Right” – Got 2 Believe), or maybe God didn’t heal you from your sickness.
Whatever plea it is that we have, when it goes unanswered, it crushes our hearts – may it be for a short time, or a long time, it doesn’t matter, we still feel disappointed in one way or another. It makes us wonder “where is God? Why is He not doing something? Why is He not saying something?” or sometimes, we even wonder if He is really real.
Sometimes, even if we had experienced God’s power before, just a simple unanswered prayer could make us forget about what He did before because we are so overwhelmed with what is happening now. It might not make us wonder if he is real, but it could make us wonder if he really is a loving Father.
Two examples:
1. Paul – God said “no” to his pleas for healing.
2 Corinthians 12:7 - "To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.'"
We don’t exactly know what that torn in the flesh was, but whatever the case, it was a chronic and debilitating problem, which at times kept him from working. This thorn was a hindrance to his ministry, and he prayed for its removal; but God refused. It must have been difficult for him but it kept him humble, reminded him of his need for constant contact with God, and benefited those around him as they saw God at work in his life.
2. Jesus – His Father said a silent “no” when he prayed, and He experienced His Father’s silence even more when He was suffering and dying on the cross.
Mark 14:36 – “Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”
Jesus faced darkness too. He was betrayed by a close friend, all of His students ran away, and then He was unfairly treated, unjustly tried, and executed by the government. Even more so, Jesus was deeply frightened by something else. He knew he was about to shoulder all the evils of humanity. And in this moment, his Father would turn his back on him. For the first and only time in existence, the love of the Trinity had something come between them. He cried “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” Jesus knew his Father’s silence too.
a) Sometimes God allows certain things to happen in our lives, no matter how bad they are or how bad we think they are, because these ultimately lead to a greater good – for us and for others as well.
Both Paul’s and Jesus’ sufferings led to something really great. Paul’s weakness had glorified the Father even more as people saw how God worked in his life through his sufferings. This led to radical conversions and commitment of people to Jesus.
Jesus’ suffering on the other hand, led to the salvation of mankind. He endured that temporary silence of the Father so that we will never have to experience God’s silence permanently. He could’ve just “no” to him as well because his task is not easy.
Romans 8: 28 – And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
b) God’s silence teaches us valuable lessons about our faith.
i) Patience
Habbakuk 2:2-3 (NLT)
2 Then the Lord said to me,
“Write my answer plainly on tablets,
so that a runner can carry the correct message to others.
3 This vision is for a future time.
It describes the end, and it will be fulfilled.
If it seems slow in coming, wait patiently,
for it will surely take place.
It will not be delayed.
There is always something greater when we wait patiently upon the Lord. As he is patient, we must also be patient. God’s perfect time is never too late, no matter how delayed we think it is. If he were to answer in his silence, he would say “Be patient! I will work out my plans in my perfect timing.” To trust God fully means to trust him even when we don’t understand why events occur as they do.
ii) Endurance
Romans 5:3, "We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they are good for us - they help us learn to endure" (NLT).
Life’s difficulties will help us learn to endure and grow. We rejoice in suffering not because we like or deny its tragedy, but because we know God is using life’s difficulties and Satan’s attacks to build our character. It builds up your spiritual stamina. These problems deepen our trust in the Lord and give us greater confidence about the future.
James 1:2-3 - 2Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.
iii) Determination
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego (Three Young Men) [Daniel 3]
Daniel 3:16-18: 16 Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to the king, "O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. 17 If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. 18 But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up."
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were pressured to deny God, but they chose to be faithful to him no matter what happened! They trusted God to deliver them, but they were determined to be faithful regardless of the consequences. If God always rescued those who were true to him, Christians would not need faith. Their religion would be a great insurance policy, and there would be lines of selfish people ready to sign up. We should be faithful to serve God whether he intervenes on our behalf or not.
c) God doesn’t want us to focus on the blessings alone, but He wants us to focus ourselves on the Saviour who blesses, saves, and heals.
When Jesus healed people in the gospels, He often told them not to tell anyone about being healed. He did not want others to focus on His miracles, but instead to focus on the glory of God. We may miss the whole message of Jesus if we are focused only on being healed from our disease and not on the Savior who heals.
- Our faith in Him should not be based on the blessings or the miracles itself, but on the one who blesses us. Because there are times when He would be silent, or He would say “no”. If our faith is as good as another answered prayer that comes our way, our faith will crumble if we receive no answer from God.
Things to remember if God seems not to answer:
- Remember how God acts in history
n He’s the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow (Hebrews 13:8)
- Keep doing the things before you; keep doing good things
n Galatians 6:9 – Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
- Pray constantly and give thanks in everything
n 1 Thess. 5:17-18 - 17pray continually; 18give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
- Look at nature and remind yourself who created these things around you
- Read his word and hold on to his promises
- Submit your will to God
Mark 14:36 – “Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”
Conclusion:
God’s silence may be just for a time or a season in our lives, and it may happen for many different reasons. But it isn’t permanent for those who seek God. And we can be confident that God is near, even when we can’t feel him.
Joshua 1:5 – No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.
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